Sunday, 30 November 2014

Me & Mine - A Family Portrait - November 2014

Sometimes kids don't want their photos taken on cue, And as much as I love our photos of where we are all smiling or showing our happy sides, I love all the other emotions too. I am starting to understand more & more each time I capture a moment, that the unexpected ones are the best, the quiet little moments of your children playing without realising you're there, documenting milestones, everyday events - breakfast, favourite things, people, bonkers outfit choices, bedtime snuggles and so on. I want to remember it all, capturing our honest life. 

So of course, I will forever love the 'good' photos, and will still capture those too, but I want to show a true reflection of 'Let's take some photographs after a long day'...

These were taken when we were on our weekend away in Mudeford, We had such a fab day but everyone was chilly & feeling super tired after a busy afternoon on the wet & windy beach.

But this is us. And I wouldn't have it any other way. :)

Here's our previous 'Me & Mine' posts

dear beautiful

Saturday, 29 November 2014

Ten Months

To my beautiful baby boy, Phoenix. 

Today, at 10:33pm you turned 10 months old. I honestly can't believe how fast the past year has gone. From you growing all cosy inside my tummy in your final months, giving birth to you in the most wonderful (albeit super fast) labour, cradling your tiny head in my hands in your first days, overcoming some difficult days in our nursing journey together, the milestones you've reached so far and so on. 

We're now at the point where you are crawling and chasing after your big sisters all the time, you have the most adorable way of sitting when you stop for a break - or when you've spotted something you want to try and eat! it's funny how each of you have had your own little quirks about you at this stage. Yve's had her little feet poking out of her highchair every time she ate there, Halle had her 'bum shuffle' and the way she extended one leg out when crawling - hilarious! and yours is to sit with one leg tucked in & a textbook baby crawl which has developed the past month from the funny little army drag. 

I find myself just gazing at you in awe - all the time. I watch your little face light up when you see your Daddy returning home from work, or how when you've just woke up from your nap you call out "Mama" with your head peeping over the top of your cot, you instantly go in search of your big sisters to make it known you're awake and ready to play. I love to watch how you are learning so much every single day, you look at the world with your fresh little eyes, everything is so new and innocent. Like watching the water running for bath time in amazement, noises you hear on our little trips to the park, people gathering around you to admire your beautiful blue eyes and pretty face. 

You are still really loving our special time just us two for when you're having mama milk, You particularly love your milk when you wake in the morning for the day, around lunch, and after bath time. The girls love to come and sit with us too half the time and ask me questions about when they had Mummy's milk, so sweet. You've also been having little bits in the night too for extra comfort as you seem to be teething too. I think you secretly just love the extra snuggles too! little beast :) As much as I get tired from the sleepless nights, like with the girls - i love these special moments, its ones we share when everyone else is peacefully snoozing, moments when I can just gaze at your little face knowing how safe and content you feel when you're in my arms, to try to take it all in, the fact of how fast you're growing, how fast all of my babies are growing.

 Such a bitter sweet feeling. 

It hasn't always been an easy breastfeeding journey. I had struggles with Yve's too, horrific pain for the first ten weeks, mastitis, an open wound, thrush and lack of confidence. All these things I'm so proud to have overcome, she helped me through, and taught me that breastfeeding is the most natural act ever. Halle was easier to feed, with a few rounds of thrush but nothing like with Yve's. 

Our journey was a bit rough around the 6-12 week mark. I think the main issue was that I expected to know what to do, and that being my third time - nothing would seem difficult. Then eventually, one thing I realised was that all babies are different. In the beginning, you fed brilliantly, then we suspected colic, or reflux or something. so we tried remedies for this, and it just went away on its own. You never cried much at all, just a few episodes when you seemed so upset and we didn't know why at the time, then you'd let out a huge belch, or from the other end! I think where you love to feed, you turn into Mr Greedypants and get full up.

 I did have a few bad days when I felt completely helpless and questioned what I could do, or if we just wasn't picking it up. Was the time of year a factor (your didn't like to be cold after bath time, does any baby? especially in winter!) did you have an allergy like Daddy did as a baby? Was you teething already? Was I suffering PND? all these things we questioned, and more but to be honest - I think its just adapting that was happening, having lots of disrupted naps where we had to do the school pick up or the girls wanting to cuddle you lots when you felt tired etc. it seemed relentless for those few days after the weeks up to your twelve week but then it just changed. you managed your burps better! wahoo! and Mummy didn't expect you to just be like Halle's feeding journey. 

PND. I think I did have an element of this, but again - it was more circumstantial. I would feel like everything was overpowering me, and I was being swallowed up by a huge dark whole. but reflecting back now, it was down to not so much sleep but more so me putting so much pressure on myself. I wanted to suit every ones needs at the same time and ignoring my own. I wanted to be the demand feeding, craft making, playful Mama, amazing home cook, glorious house keeper, happy and showing no signs of tiredness or baby sick down my top partner, chauffeur to pre-school and back, food shopper, blogger, photographer every day, all bundled into one. when all I should have been doing in those early weeks was sitting, and recovering with my beautiful new baby snoozing on my chest and trying to nap when others offered to help. I've always been that way, stubborn. I find it hard to accept help, as I personally see it as "me not being able to cope" or something ridiculous. when really - everyone needs a break from time to time. this is something i'm trying to learn more lately, but it doesn't come easy. 

Back to the more recent events of you my sweet boy, you're climbing on everything and everyone, you are so strong and you managed to pull the play wooden kitchen on yourself twice yesterday in a split second. you enjoy our family swimming sessions every Friday evening, you really enjoy your food too! 

The past month or so you've started saying "mama", "dada" and only once have you said "Yve". I love this stage you're at, you're my cuddly koala bear and giggle at everything. You resemble your biggest sister so much to look at and with a hint of Halle too, but more so Yve's. You've all had the chunky thighs, big eyes, long eyelashes and cheeky faces though! its amazing how you can all grow inside the same womb yet be completely individual, Obviously its biology but I still find it fascinating. You are also just like Daddy was as a baby (as still now) for loving back tickles! you go into the sweetest hypnotising mode!

I truly feel so blessed to have you in my life Phoenix.

And a couple from my 'big camera'

All my love, Mama xx

Linking up with  the 'ordinary moments' 
mummy daddy me

and 'Share with me'

Thursday, 27 November 2014

Rainbow Rain sticks

Some days the washing can wait.

Even the hoovering can wait. 

Some days I find that the best therapy for all is to play.

Crafting things and simply playing. Allowing your children to get imaginative with art supplies or just general bits of scrap that probably would've gone in the bin without a thought. Some days we have the days where we are happy to not be doing so much, to just sit back and... just be. However, there are also the days where small children want to have something to do, something to challenge them or to just simply enable them to create. My go to is always crafting. I sit them either at the breakfast bar (more recently, so little chap doesn't eat all the stuff off the floor!) or if he's napping - on our mat on the living room floor, or garden depending on the craft.

The girls are completely obsessed with rainbows this year, and its something that we all enjoy as a family. to hunt around after some showers, or so look out for rainbow lights peeping through the window, rainbow (petrol) puddle - you name it. Whenever they have paint, pencils or pens - it's a wonderful selection of rainbows you will see. So this inspired our craft. 

'Rainbow rain sticks'

I found these materials in our cupboard.

Scissors, tissue paper I picked up from Wilkinsons (also used at Yve's rainbow themed 4th birthday party.)

Shred the tissue paper, we started cutting but found that ripping was way more fun.

PVA glue pots, brushes, sticks or just use your fingers to glue the whole tube. (We got these from their Nanny who got them from the library. just usual poster tubes will be fab!)

Picking dried glue, all kids love this right?

Concentration in its truest form.

Perfecting her style.

We used dried pasta shells in one tube, and rice in the other. They really enjoyed rolling them side to side to listen for the different sounds. 

Or use them as wands, or swords. This was Halle turning me into a frog "Like Winnie the Witch".

So there you go. It's an ordinary craft, it doesn't break the bank, and its allowing your children to use their imaginations, have fun and you may even enjoy yourself too. I know I did!


Monday, 24 November 2014

Living Arrows 7 - Castles

The weekend just gone, we took our last family holiday before Christmas. (post coming very soon!) we did plenty of crabbing, playing on the wet and windy beach, indulged in lots of hot chocolates (of course) and ate some delicious food. I just love this photo, as it sums up such a brilliant aspect of childhood.

i heart snappingliving arrows

A little adventure to mudeford

We started our morning with Yve's being super excited as she got to take her Daddy into pre-school for the 'tiger who came to tea' parent workshop, he really enjoyed it too as it was lovely to spend time with her, and see what she gets up to while he's at work. Then it was off to get a cheeky donut... then it was off on our weekend trip away!

Sunday, 23 November 2014

{Ordinary moments} - Happy birthday Dad

My Dad really is my hero.

I have grown with the knowledge that my Dad will forever be there for me. We are lucky enough to see him almost every day if not every other day, I seek comfort in knowing my Dad is around. It's always been that way, after my parents split when I my brother & I were only small, we use to alternate for who we stayed with. My brother & I would always moan about who's turn it was, and I would always want to be where my Dad was. It was a very emotional and confusing time, but he would always try his best to shelter us from it all. He would go above and beyond to make us feel safe, and to make us feel happy. I think about more recent years, and even though I have been a parent myself now for 4 years, I seek comfort in knowing my Dad is nearby. If I need a chat, If I feel worried about something, he is always there to listen and offer positive thoughts. A few years back, when Yve's was only 14 months old and I was 16 weeks pregnant with Halle, life through one of the biggest challenges my way, ever. My soulmate was kept away from us for 10 months. 10 very long, heart-wrenching months (Something we still find too raw to talk about). It tested my sanity, my strength, my heart. I was in a state of shock everyday and had to keep strong for my little girl, and unborn baby. Some days I would feel so alone but he would make me feel safe, and tell me that the light at the end of the very dark tunnel was getting nearer day by day.

My Dad will forever be included in my 'ordinary moments', I enjoy having our conversations, talking about complete rubbish half the time, talking about our dreams, aspirations, reminiscing about the past, drinking lots of tea, eating too much cake and admiring the little children that I became a Mummy to, his Grandchildren. I thank my Dad for raising me, and being a huge part in the parent I am today. As I write this, he is enjoying his last night on holiday, thats another thing. he's completely fearless when it comes to travelling, alone that is. something I find so admirable. He has the 'travel bug' and I love to hear about his adventures each time. 
and recently he's had another adventure and had his portrait painted by a very talented lady called Elizabeth Meek  (image 49). She is the President of the Society of Women Artists or President of the Royal Miniature Society. This extraordinary adventure my Dad went is completely wonderful don't you think? I do.

Dad, you really do amaze me, you really are one in a million, and whatever life throws at you, you face it head on, show no fear and live life to the max. Remember, You are never too old to set a dream, go after it and succeed. I have all the faith in you.

This post is to say a very happy birthday to my remarkable, whitty and fantastic Dad. 

Love from Noobs

Mother & Son.

(I couldn't add the other images due to my computer being down)

Linking up with  the 'ordinary moments' 
mummy daddy me


Tuesday, 18 November 2014

Living Arrows (Hot chocolate lurve) - 6

I think it's very safe to say that I have always been a huge fan of hot chocolates.
So as my girls are growing, I've now learned that they too share the same love for them, as long as they come with lashings of cream and lots of cute little mini marshmallows of course.

As the weather is becoming more colder and wetter, this means taking advantage of having these delicious drinks in warm cafes, or our favourite hide out is at home all nice & cosy under a blanket and awaiting the arrival of our hot chocolates from the kitchen and the "hot chocolate master" - thats me ;)

This photo makes me giggle, they were all giddy as they were waiting to go to a friends birthday party at the 'build a bear workshop' and literally were bouncing off the chairs with excitement!

I love this image as I know it's a true representation of an element in their childhood, and that is - the love of hot chocolates (with cream & marshmallows!)

I wanted to bring my 'big camera' but I had my hands full with my three little wild ones choosing bears in the shop! ;)
living arrowsi heart snapping

Monday, 17 November 2014

Patience, Diminishing a dark cloud, and being you.

Dont you just hate it when you're feeling so irritated, impatient, and just not yourself. The feeling of being out of control with your thoughts, coping mechanisms, the feeling of a dark cloud hanging over you.
The worst feeling is when you snap or take your mood out on others. Particularly your loved ones.

feel that the triggers are usually hunger and tiredness in most cases.  Hunger is self explanatory, as we need fuel to live. We need energy to thrive, and most definitely a full tank to keep up with all aspects of motherhood. Tiredness can be a difficult thing to cope with, It makes you feel lethargic, run down and empty. It creates a thick fog that surrounds you, making any small thing seem like a big deal. You become snappy, irrational and "bite" at little things and in most cases - lose sight of the chilled, calm and patient person you usually are.

It steals happiness. 

This feeling is something that I am no stranger to, I have these days sometimes and it really does put things into perspective. It makes the good days seem even more magical, and makes you feel a huge sense of gratitude when looking at your life in the realistic light, and in a positive form. So i'm trying to channel my inner peace lately. I find myself setting too many tasks, just trying to do too much and not allow time got myself to refuel. 

So I am slowing down. I'm going to try and not set myself up for failure (too many things on my to-do list) and I am going to try to get the right balance between being a Mumma & being me.

I dedicate my life to my children, that will not alter, but I need to remember that I am my own person too. No one else's issue here, it's mine and I am slowly coming to realise that it is okay to want your own time, a quiet space uninterrupted, even if it is a cup of tea alone, to read a book, a meal with my friends etc. I'm recently trying to get in on the family photos, in years to come I want to be remembered for getting in on the fun instead of chasing everyone with the camera! I'm starting to find my own sense of style with fashion once again, I may get it completely wrong, but hey - being unique is better than a copyrighted version of yourself. After having my children, I lost the idea of who I was, and what I liked. This isn't to put a negative spin on my life as a Mumma, I just want myself to wake up and realise that I need to stay in tune with myself along with all my other duties. 

I am going to realise that I matter too in this equation that is life. 

{Not sure why the font keeps changing!}


Sunday, 16 November 2014

{Ordinary Moments} - Sisters

Since I started to join in with this wonderful link up, I've written lots and lots about my beautiful little children living our ordinary but in my eyes - extra ordinary life together. 

Something that takes my breath away at times is the bond my girls share. One day they are the best of friends and the next they can be annoying each other about who's the best at doing a puzzle and so on. The one thing I have noticed, even though they are only just 4 and 2 and a half years old is that whatever day they seem to be having, they always show each other the most amount of unconditional love. If they have a disagreement - they will make up immediately, they like to make sure they're still "best friends". If they're watching a movie, all they want to do is find comfort in each others presence, snuggle up and grab each other if in need of a squeeze. This is completely adorable and beautiful to witness. 

It also reminds me of myself and my younger sister Poppi.

Even though she is almost ten years younger than me, we used to be like this as kids. I always felt like she was my baby really, I would look after her all the time, take her out with me everywhere, take her with me to my dads when there was trouble at our mums, just to make sure she was safe and to not see what we witnessed quite a lot in some years, which was a lot of arguments and violence in the home. I just knew I needed to keep her content. She use to look at her big sister with a trustful look and knew I'd be there for her, regardless. and we're still close now. We have arguments, mostly silly little ones yet we feel the need to reconcile, reconnect and make sure we're both ok and not upset. We don't see each other all the time, but we just know that if we need one another, we'll be there. 

September 2012

And this is how I want my 'little sisters' to be, and even so with their little brother. I want them to stay close, stick together if times get tough and above all - love one another unconditionally throughout their lives. 

My ordinary moment here lies with the fact that it can seem like a very normal thing to have a sister. Something that some people may take for granted, but it should be treasured. I feel so lucky to have a sister, she will be my friend for life. The same goes for the fact we have an older brother, no matter what life throws at you, you should all stick together.

Linking up with  the 'ordinary moments' 
mummy daddy me


Thursday, 13 November 2014

{Siblings} - November 2014

Watching the bond between these three is truly something special. 

Lets talk about my 'sisters' first. These two have such an unbreakable bond despite having moments where they are bickering or their personalities are clashing in some way. They will often want the same toy, or its usually when Yve's will offer help to Halle, but her being a two year old who loves to do everything herself - it causes a disagreement. I have moments where I think "Why are they arguing again?!" over the same sodding toy! ... the thing is, is that they love lots of the same things, have lots of similarities, but on the flip side there is 1 1/2 years age development between them, and they also have different temperaments. A very same/different situation here. For an example, we have been really into puzzles lately, Halle is obsessed with a Disney princess 16 piece puzzle, and Yve's loves her Disney 3D multi pack - one minute they are doing their own puzzles, then they will annoy each other about who's is who's, or Yves will offer help and Hal will refuse saying "I just do it all myself!!"

Yve's has always been thoughtful, helpful and loving. She will offer to lend a caring hand all the time, especially to her younger sister. Halle loves to do everything on her own, but funnily enough she also likes to have some help at times if un sure. I look at the playing, and I think Halle doesn't realise she isn't the same age as her big sister, she aspires to do all that she can but sometimes her age development holds her back - not a lot though, she's a bright little girl, and almost as tall as big sis!

It's when I see moments like these that melt my heart, this is the girls at some point every afternoon, You can tell they miss each other so much when Yve's goes to preschool in the morning, Halle is desperate to stay with her! 

Just look at these snuggles....

Disney dvd snuggles are lovely

They always have time for huge cuddles for each other!

Lending a helping hand, as always <3

They really are a pair of doting big sisters to this little chap. They always want to snuggle and kiss his chubby cheeks, and find it hilarious now he's following them around, crawling all over the place and climbing on everything! They also have the best faces to cheer him up when he's feeling tired and makes him burst into fits of giggles!

I'm being attacked with love, help!

Relaxed afternoons are the best with these three.

Excuse Yve's yawn, but look at his eyes.... completely true to colour.

"Wait for me Yve's"

"Lets show Phoenix the lovely colourful leaves Hal"

Big cuddles!

I feel so fortunate to spend life with these three, watching their bond blossom into something beautiful, I really hope they stay close, and be there for each other, forever.

Find our other 'Siblings' posts below:

May 2014
June 2014

July 2014
August 2014
September 2014
October 2014

dear beautiful
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